Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Writing Prompt: You have just swallowed your pride and done something you didn't want to do. Your friend wants to know why. The two of you are driving around an almost-full parking garage looking for a space for the friend's oversize pickup. Write the scene.

Me: (on phone) No No No that's not what I meant. I mean sure, I'll do it.
Rick: (driving) It's what he always says.
Me: (off) Rick!
Rick: Sorry. Here we are in the big parking lot. Let's see if it's big 'nuff for my low riding Durango.
Me: Ahm, no that was just my friend Rick, we're at the market buying food—
Rick:—Tools!
Me: Tools for his stint on Food Network.
Rick: It's Master Chef! (sotto) And it's also hella hard to park in the dark.
Me: Anyway, sorry and I'll do it… Love you?
Phone clicks off.
Me: (into phone) Hello?… Hello?
Rick: "And I love you too, Danny-Poo!"
Me: Ah, can it, man. You've no idea the grief I'm going through. I mean can you believe she's making me go to Church.
Rick: I can't believe you're still letting your Mom tell you what to do. (Honking) Hey you Fucking Ferrari, that was my spot! (Revs off deeper into the parking lot) Jackass.
Me: I mean it's just a concept I can't wrap my head around.
Rick: Which is why Virgin Mary will be more than happy to circle jerk you with the women uncovering your tomb! Look, just lie but tell her you did it. That way, you don't break her heart and you get to snag a street spot in the handicap—(Speeds but Crashes) Fuck! My ride's busted! Where am I going to put my food?
Me: Tools.
Rick: What-ever!

Writing Prompt: Tell a complete stranger about a beloved family tradition.

My mom doesn't work. And while we [her family] appreciate the time she endows to everybody from the kids to the far relatives to even our dog Frosty, it'd be even more gracious if she could make some moolah. But her luck is good enough. Every coupla weeks or so, my mom will get her paycheck from God in the form of dollars on the floor. At times, it won't be more than $5, at others it'll be something like $250. An incredible life my Mom leads doing nothing but being the inspiration for me as a future parent. Anyway, that's why you should gimme money.


Write a scene where the only spoken dialogue is "Uh-Huh," "Umm," "Urr," "Mm-mmm."

INT. CHAPEL - DAY

Friends, family and ALICE (30s, ecstatic, pretty) grin wide as she joins her hubby-to-be, CHUCK (late-30s, nonchalant.) Joining hands they face the DEACON (elderly but kind) as he opens his mouth to speak…

SLAM!

MATTHEW (early 30s, dashing, Alice's first love) GASPS loud as he breaks in the party butt-naked.

                     MATTHEW
                 (disapprovingly 
                    but spirited)
                Mm-mmm! Urrrr!

Alice turns and leaves Chuck for Matthew.

                     ALICE
                Umm, Uh-huh.

They leave.
                                             FADE OUT:
                     END.

                 

Writing Prompt: What a character holding a blue object is thinking right now

Boy, oh boy, I love boisonberry* ice cream! You know who else does? Jill! Wowee! I can't wait to give it to her to try and see if she will go to the dance with me! Then I can slip those nice electric socks I have to woo her into playing ping pong!

*Actually it's a red purplish colour. Sorry. (See below.)

Photo Credit: Hitchhiking to Heaven


Writing Prompt: The long-lost roommate



It was whilst I was in my mother's womb that I had my roommate. My long lost roommate, Ynnad. But within the rest in watching Johnny Test, listening to Jimmy Buffet and eating eggs without garlic salt, was just the biggest giveaway that he was a malevolent evil twin. I wonder where he is now?

Writing Prompt: Something you had that was stolen

Once I looked for my Luxembourgian family in Barcelona, I left my DS, teddy bear and books with my Dad, who, distracted by a bum asking for a smoke, did not notice my stolen backpack.